Posted by: 2stepsback | October 27, 2007

Open source is dead – bullshit generator

Sure it is! I hope to entertain, once more.
Read on:

The “mainstream media” tries to make big headlines and scare innocent people while all the time misleading everyone. Some Megaflop big-shot used similar language some time ago – “Linux is finished, Linus has got a job” etc. etc.
So, I present a bigger and better list of bullshit for your weekend entertainment.

The Grand Opensource FUD And Bullshit Generator – GOFAB!

NOTE:

All of these are harmless senseless headlines.
I’ve got more of it, but people should point to this whenever some mean media company says crap like this again.
License:
You can copy and redistribute, print, publish and sell, and otherwise use the printout for any legal means, even un-civic 😉 , after all, it’s one load of bullshit.
BUT, don’t change a word of it, Or I’ll sue you for copyright violation into the millions. I know some very good lawyers as well. And I won’t even send you a cease and desist – instant warrant and arrest! (sounds friendly, no?)

  • Open source is finished
  • RedHat has never beat Megaflop in any quarter so far –
    (for the record: Redhat can never reach Megaflop sales because Megaflop is a monopolist – RedHat has also never paid fines in 100s of millions of dollars.
  • Linus had to come over from Transmeta to help a sagging, dying operating system
  • Linux always copies everything from proprietary software.
  • Unix was made by people for companies and Linus illegally robbed it from them, in the guise of a student. He is the Devil Incarnate, not allowing traditionally accepted and respected corporations to run their established businesses, conserve and enhance the value of their valuable brands.
  • Samba is a broken server and needs Windows to function properly.
  • Linux’s handling of NTFS has been poor (how about searching for “closed formats” and “lock in” and “embrace extend extinguish”). Btw, i use knoppix to recover my data from crashed Windows XP.
  • No web server runs Linux or Apache these days – people running LAMP stacks are feeling stuck with an old technology. [See Footnote 1]
  • LAMPs are ancient things. Tubelights, Shiverlight, M0r0nlight are modern. Don’t live in the stone age. [See Footnote 1]
  • The allegedly “most popular” PHP 4 language has been declared dead and obsolete by the makers of the language themselves. Experts say that the security issues forced the PHP group to withdraw the version after nearly three years of troubles, ending countless heartaches to hobby and experienced programmers worldwide.
    (@PHP-group: you should have a good laugh as well. BTW, for the record, i’ve made a living out of PHP, so thanks.)
  • Oh come on! Friends, the FSF has only a few lawyers and that RMS idiot, he’s not even a lawyer. As for Eben Moglen, he’s a nicety nicety chap with a sweet smile – harmless, at best.
  • Did you know that the FSF and GNU do not even pay a pittance to their volunteer coders? Isn’t that exploitation at its worst? For the sake of unknown users, this group of self-styled idealists captures and brainwashes innocent minds into writing programs for free. They dull their emotional intelligence in such a strange way that although the programs they write are somehow of a very good quality, they seem to not like to think like normal business people. That is a serious threat to future of our society as a whole. Imagine people not wanting to do business, but instead wanting to help others!
  • If you use opensource code, your business secrets are open for anybody to see!
    [LET ME CLARIFY, SEE THE TITLE OF THIS POST – THIS IS *BULLSHIT*]
  • Have you ever seen what goes on, on IRC, where these guys claim there is instant support for any of those opensource projects? There are so many trolls and malicious users. Would you not prefer talking to a decent support person at well facilitated support centers instead? (and of course pay a few tiny bills…)
    Plus, why would you ever want to talk to, on occasion the very leader of the opensource project directly, one-to-one? Also shows how these guys loot our wealth and sit chatting on IRC!

So, there! That should fix that media-headline bug, at least for now!
I want more bullshit! Yeah!


FOOTNOTE 1: Whenever you visit a website of a tech journal that says anything against opensource, always make it a point to visit netcraft.com and see what the site is running. Then you will see who is trying to fool whom. FLOSS programmers and designers slog their butts out to make software free for everyone, and these media crooks use that very same top-quality software and get away with writing lies like that, only because you, the reader, is lazy not to verify what you have read.
You should give it your own independent thought also, not just read and swallow any rubbish they stuff down your throat.
After all, finally it is the safety of your business and your data that is at stake.


Changelog:
Last Updated: 29-10-2007 10:04:08 UTC

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